Safe Sex And BDSM Practical Guidelines and Advice on AIDS Prevention within SM play HIV Transmission:      HIV (the virus that can lead to AIDS) can be avoided. HIV is passed from one person to another when infected blood,semen (cum) or vaginal secretions (vaginal juice) goes from one person’s body into another, and then makes its way into your bloodstream. You don’t have to worry about: saliva (spit),perspiration (sweat),urine (piss) or fæces (shit) on the outside of the bodyAlways remember to use common sense. Ensure that first- aid items are readily at hand. By remembering these basics, you can make any kind of sex safer. SM Risk Reduction:      Most SM activities have always been low-risk for getting HIV (Human Immunodeficiency Virus). Responsible SM has always been about practising safety. getting a sexually transmitted disease (STD), like HIV, can be prevented. But there are other possible dangers with SM. For more information on how to avoid these, read material like the On the Safe Edge: A Manual for SM play by Trevor Jacques, et al, Lesbian SM Safety Manual by Pat Califia; SM 101 by Jay Wiseman; or Screw the Roses, Send me the Thorns by Molly Devon and Phillip Miller.Generalized information on HIV and STDs is available from most Community Health Centres, doctor’s offices/clinics or community AIDS organizations. SM Etiquette:      Use the etiquette of SM. It’s really just a matter of respecting the person(s) with whom you’re playing. You should agree upon a safety word and what you want to do in a scene before you start the scene. A safety word (or motion) is used by any partner to stop the scene immediately, no questions asked. There is no shame in using the safety word. It’s there for both of you. You should respect it and your partner’s limits and feelings at all times.      Always consider your partner(s). Discuss interests, pleasures, perceived needs etc. If you are unsure of a certain sexual or SM activity, then hold off until you’re familiar with the safety aspects of it. Find out as much as you can beforehand, so you can make a decision about how and/or when to proceed.      If you are HIV+, think about how infection with STDs -- or re-infection with HIV -- could affect your immune system. Bow out when necessary. For example, don’t deep throat a sore throat. By being interested in your health and practising safer sex, you are doing a lot to help stop the transmission of HIV and other STDs.      Always ask before using someone else’s toy. They may not want you to use it, or it may be broken. By practising the guidelines mentioned in this pamphlet, you will be making your contribution to the community of safer SM players. Lubticants:       Lubricants (lubes) can be lots of fun, whether used for play or insertion. Flavoured brands can be used externally or for oral sex. If you’re going to insert something into someone, you should only use a water-based unscented brand - like K-Y, Lubafax, Muco, Safer Sex lube, Astroglide, or Wet. Never use oil-based lubes (like Vaseline or Crisco); they weaken latex condoms and loves, making them more likely to break.      Also, during a scene, you shouldn’t take lube from a large container. Either buy small portions and throw the packets away afterwards or put enough lube for this play time into something disposable (like a paper cup or plate). Some brands come in pump jars. This makes sure that nobody’s "dirty" hand, penis, or whatever can get into your personal supply of lube. Your Rectum:      The rectum (ass) is more delicate than most parts of your body and you should take care of it. Sticking things up your rectum - whether it’s a finger, cock, dildo, fist, or anything else - can tear the rectal lining. Even extremely tiny tears can open up the body and be places where HIV can get in. Fucking without protection is a high-risk activity, since a penis ejaculates semen (cums). A penis also has a pee hole in the end, which can let viruses in. Always use a latex condom, and use it properly.      To put on a condom: first make sure the penis is erect. If it’s uncircumcised, pull back the foreskin before putting on the condom. Squeeze the air out of the tip. If the condom is round- ended and doesn’t have a tip, squeeze the air out and leave 1 cm free at the tip of the penis.      Lubricate the outside of the condom really well with a water-based lube (like K-Y, Muco, Wet, Safer Sex Lube, or Astroglide). Never use oil-based lube (like Crisco or Vaseline); it can damage condoms. Pull out soon after you come, grabbing the base of the penis to make sure the condom doesn’t slip off. To be extra careful, you can start fucking with a condom, and then pull out before you come - you can then cum on the chest, thighs, hand, or whatever.      If you finger a rectum, be careful not to finger it if you have a cut or sore on your finger or if you have long/sharp nails. You could also use a latex glove when fingering. As for dildos, make sure they’ve been cleaned before they go up your rectum (see the section on cleaning toys). Douching And Enemas:      If fisting, fucking, or dildos are part of your sexual activity, some people feel it is very important to have a clean ass or vagina. But douching, or using enemas before getting fucked, could leave you more open to infection. They can wash away the surface mucous that’s there to protect you.      Never share your douche bag. Clean your douche bag each time you use it. Also, don’t share the nozzles of metal shower douches. Get a separate nozzle for each friend, label it, and clean it between uses (see the section on cleaning toys). Douching or enemas should not be used after sex because they don’t necessarily wash things away - they can also push infected semen, blood or feces further into the body. Infections and bacteria douched up into a woman’s uterus and fallopian tubes can cause Pelvic Inflammatory Disease (PID) - which could lead to infertility, or worse. Your Vagina:      Successful play with your vagina (cunt) depends on paying attention to detail, because a great variation of sensations occurs over very small areas. It’s easy to bruise, cut, or tear your vagina, so you should take the same care to protect it whenever anything goes into it. The inner parts of the vagina are mucous membranes, so a good rule is to make sure that your play is less aggressive here. Anything inserted into the vagina should be properly washed and have no sharp edges.      Your vagina can be damaged in other ways too -- you can: bruise or scrape the cervix, which is located about 10 cm inside the vagina (the exact position varies from woman to woman); tear the skin between the vagina and the rectum; bruise the tissue between the pubic bones; or cut and scrape around the pee hole. All of these can open up your body to HIV - or other STDs - making vaginal intercourse without a condom a high risk activity. A good rule of thumb is that too much lubricant is not enough. If you don’t use enough, you may cause tears and rips, or a mechanically induced vaginitis. vaginal play depends on moving slowly to generate fairly symmetrical sensations, and remembering that the border between pleasure and pain here is razor thin. So get to know the size and shape of your partner’s vagina, and remember that it changes shape depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle, and how excited she gets. Toys:      When you were growing up, your mother probably told you to share your toys. Well, for sex toys, forget it! Anything that goes into a person’s rectum and/or vagina could transmit HIV or other STDs, if it’s shared. Any toy that draws blood can also be a risk. If you’re a bottom, the best idea would be to have your own toys and get your top to use them on you. If you’re a top, ask the bottom what toys he or she owns. Or, if having sex with various bottoms, you should assign and mark toys only for them.       For example, if you spank someone with a sturdy wire brush, you’re going to draw blood. So, tape the bottom’s name onto the back of the brush - maybe even tape the brush to the bottom’s leg - but don’t use it on anyone else. The same applies to dildos, butt plugs, etc.

.